Even this post will probably take me ages to write because I just keep delaying absolutely everything. That's a really scary thing for me to say because I never used to be like that. I don't want to imply that I've always been completely organised, but I never used to procrastinate about doing tasks either. I would consider myself quite a workaholic so I really don't know how to handle it properly when I don't feel like working.
I'll work harder "tomorrow"
The main reason why I can't be bothered to try properly with tasks is because I keep failing at everything I try. If I put loads of effort into a task and I fail miserably, what's the point in even trying next time? And I've just got my mock exam results back for my A Levels and lets just say... I would't be too happy if I got those results in the real ones. Mind you I didn't do as badly as I thought I did, but it was just a bit disheartening to see that's the best I could do when I put so much effort into it.
An accurate representation of what
happens whenever I try to do something
I also feel like there's not enough hours in a day to get everything done. It's like I'm slowing down in a world that's speeding up. I haven't got round to sitting down, clearing my head, organizing my life and then doing my tasks. I think that would take too much time which is definitely something I don't have at the moment.
I don't know how, but I feel like this picture is very relevant
On top of everything else I just feel like it has been an overall bad week for the entire World which just kinda makes everything seem a bit pointless. Literally every single news story I heard this week has been bad news, every single one! It's just been accidents followed by breakups followed by suicides followed by bands splitting up (I'm sure you all know who I'm talking about). That's made me quite demotivated because there doesn't seem much point getting out of bed if there's nothing good out there.
And I'm sorry if it looks like I've not been putting a lot of effort into my blog or channel lately and that I haven't been posting as much as I used to. I've started to overthink every move I make so it means that I don't think that any of the posts I've been writing have been good enough to post lately. I'd rather post things that I'm happy with rather than something that is clearly rushed.
When I rush to finish a post
Another reason why I haven't been blogging as much as I'd like to is becasue I've been trying to put more effort into my revision (you wouldn't think that by seeing my results though haha). It would be great if I found an effective method to revise but for now it looks like I'll just have to result in stapling a revision guide to my face and walking round like that 24/7.
Thank you for reading. The song of the day is Salute by Little Mix because it always seems to motivate me so hopefully it will do the same now. If you feel like you have no motivation either, don't worry, you're not alone and we can both power through this thing we call life together! xxx